Five reasons why I want a bigger butt, and one reason why I don’t

As I was getting ready for my day, I started with the shoes. I picked out a pair of black and grey heels, which called for a grey waffle-knit shirt which then asked to be complimented by my black “hipster hat,” and I finished it off with a pair of jeans.

A pair of jeans, might I add, which do absolutely NOTHING for my keister.

And maybe that’s just because I’ve lost some weight and they don’t fit the same, or maybe it’s just because there’s nothing to go wild about with my butt.

I’ve thought about this all day, and thus, a blog post was born.

So without further ado, “Five Reasons Why I Want a Bigger Butt”:

  1. Maybe for once I could fill out a pair of jeans.
  2. My tailbone wouldn’t fall asleep after sitting for too long.
  3. “Baby Got Back” would apply to me.
  4. People might forget that I’m ginger for even just one second.
  5. I can use words like “bootylicious” and not sound like a nut.

Now, I’m not saying I want to be able to sit a forty on my badonk, I’m just saying that it’d be nice if I didn’t go straight from back to thigh.

I feel like too many of my outfits are ruined because I only have one part of the “T and A” on lock. And if you’re reading this post, you probably know which part that is.

But as promised, one reason why I’m content keeping the ass I’ve been given:

  1. It’s what I’ve got and I’m making it work.

And really, to be honest, I already have to deal with big boobs; I don’t think a big butt would do me any good anyway. 🙂

Until tomorrow,



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