Five things I’ve learned from dating someone who loves football

In the past 11 months since moving to the Boston area, I’ve found myself experiencing a lot of new things: New food, new hobbies, new ways to be lazy. But the last thing I ever thought that would happen to me because I moved to New England was that I’d find any interest in football. Well…”interest” is an overstatement really, but I do have a new appreciation for it at the very least.

This immersion has come with some learning experiences, as you can imagine. So I’ve created a list of five things that I’ve learned from being, what I call, a “football widow”:

1. I know that Sundays are for Football (even when the Pats aren’t playing)

It’s basically mandatory for you to like the Patriots if you live somewhere in New England, and that means that, unless you’re dead or dying, you’ve got your ass parked in front of the tube during their games. Little did I know, being in a relationship with someone who watches football like it’s part of his religion, it doesn’t matter if the Pats are playing or not: Sunday is for football. Yes, the entire day. This means that sometimes we’re (I use “we” loosly here) cheering for a team that we don’t usually want to win. And that means that, at times, I get to feel part of the crowd because the great state of Minnesota is being represented by “my team.” With that being said…

2. I will defend “my team” (the Vikings) even though I don’t actually care about them (and that’s okay)

I frequently see on Facebook while the Vikings are playing that “sometimes it’s hard to be a Vikings fan.” I’ve come to understand that this is because the good ol’ Vikes don’t always do so hot for simple mistakes. But rest assured, I only cheer for them because I’m “supposed” to “have a team” and I have not crossed over into the dark side to be consumed by the Patriots’ nation. Despite all of this, as long as I have a team to call my own, I’ve been told that I can still be part of the football family.

3. Oh yeah: Sometimes Mondays are also for football. And Thursdays, too.

This one was completely new to me and I had to adapt quickly. Apparently not all of the games during the season can be completed during one day per week – they need to seep into our beings for the entire week. We’ve got to be on our A-game on all of these days!! This, I’m still getting used to…

4. Dropping Eric Decker’s or Carson Wentz’s name during a conversation makes me “cool”

This one I learned early. Having ANY sort of connection to these two people has greatly improved the likeliness that I’ll be included in a conversation about football. For those of you new to my life: Erik Decker graduated from my high school only a few years before I did and Carson Wentz went to college right across the river from me at NDSU and gives a shit about the charity my cousins started. I know that these two are good people, and I know that people like knowing that. And because of these connections, I get to act for a few short moments as though I know something about football. Even though…

5. I still don’t know anything about football

I think this is self-explanatory. I mean, I get the basic premise: There are two teams and both are trying to get the ball into their end zone by making plays which may include running, kicking, and throwing. But beyond that, I have zero idea about how this game works. Actually, I do more giggling while watching football because of things like “tight ends” and the tantrums that Odell Beckham Jr. (yeah, I know his name) throws on the regular. And maybe not knowing anything about this game is half the fun for me and why I keep watching (we should both know by now that I’m also using “watching” loosely here as well) each week.

I’m nowhere near a place where I find myself wanting to purchase a jersey or a T-shirt or something, because clearly I’m nowhere near wanting to learn more about this sport. I am, however, happy to sit and watch the games because it makes other people happy. And sometimes that’s the important thing in life.

Until tomorrow,

cheers. xx


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